The Beginning our OUR story

Paris. La ville d’amour. Well, yes. That’s true but it’s so much more really. It’s big, scary, beautiful, magical; and full of Parisians. We arrived on December 19th with a full 10 days to explore this magical place. It didn’t go quite as we had planned.

Day one was a mixture of wet feet, bad maps, a way bigger city than we were used to, exciting landmarks (eek! Eiffel tower! The Louvre!), some mild Christmas shopping, overpriced cafes and a fight that goes down in history. We won’t bore you with the gorey details. We have both expressed that we want this blog to be a brutally honest and real account of our travels, however, the transformation that occurred on that street (literally a sidewalk) in a Parisian suburb cannot really be explained. It was overdue and had little to do with each other and everything to do with ourselves. (Does that even make sense?) All I know is that I (Kalene) could actually feel myself in the present moment, come into myself in a way I’ve never experienced. Things became clearer about what I needed to do, what I wanted to do and what crap I was no longer willing to put up with. And I figured it all out with a 3$ bottle of vodka straight up and a really long cry, which turned to uncontrollable laughter and back to sobs a good six times.

We sat and cried uncontrollably (yes we). Strangers were looking at us but we didn’t care. We were having a moment--together. We realized we were being too influenced by others opinions and our own fears. We were stretching ourselves too thin. We decided that “From now on we buy what we need when we need it; no more compromising on our adventure”. Yet, we still planned to stick to a secure budget. I (Ken) threw my piece of shit boots in a nearby trash can and wore Kalene’s socks in my runners until we got to an overpriced hostel. It was great though because we left a lot of emotional baggage on the curb.

The next phase of Paris involved preparation for the Christmas we’d been dreaming about for the past 6 months. Buying proper clothes for the weather, Christmas music, shopping (separately on a few occasions), a free walking tour of Paris, the Louvre, and a fabulous night at a sold out theatre. We were still trying to eat on a budget and decide when we needed something (like Ken’s new boots) or just wanted something (like Kalene’s Starbucks). We had after all sprung for the piece de resistance, a hotel for Christmas for 3 nights. Tres chic.

December 23rd we checked into the Hotel Design de la Sorbonne and hit up Monmartre. It’s a pretty calm, artsy and cheap neighbourhood. We were enjoying some sushi for lunch but our hearts weren’t into the tourist thing. We wanted to be home with carols on the radio and Christmas cookies in hand. So we headed back to the hotel to cuddle in bed and try to get in the spirit. I (Kalene) ended up finding Majic 100 the Ottawa radio station which plays Christmas tunes all day. We streamed it on the iMac provided by the hotel and poured some rum and cokes. We were trying to pump ourselves up but somehow we were getting more and more lonely. We felt trapped. It occurred to us that Crhistmas is about family and friends. Paris felt cold and was full of strangers. Finally Ken suggested we get out of the hotel room and take a walk. So, we bundled up good and stepped outside. It was snowing. In Paris. The day before Christmas. I (Kalene) would get my white Christmas after all.

Magic ensued. We walked all the way from Sorbonne to the Eiffel tower. It wasn’t even on purpose at first, we were peeking in store windows and reminiscing about Christmases past. The snow was falling around us with a deafening silence and for once, the streets of Paris were quiet. After about 20 minutes, we could see the beacon of romance shining ahead of us. The Eiffel tower in all her glory. We walked for over five hours that night. We had FINALLY had the moment of magic we wanted in Paris, and there were many more to come.

There’s this weird balance you have to find while traveling, that of letting the moments happen naturally, and putting in the effort to make the adventure come to life. It’s a ying and yang of having goals and dreams and not allowing the things that don’t meet your dreams ruin the journey. It’s really hard! I mean really really hard. I think we both have the goal of learning to live in the moment, something I (Kalene) have always struggled with. This trip is making that struggle glaringly obvious. I see myself wanting the adventure to be bigger, more unbelievable, more exciting. And thus, I forget to enjoy the excitement I am fortunate enough to get.


The Story of the Ring. By Ken. So, during our colossal meltdown on the streets of Paris we were getting ourselves together I then knew that I was with the one person I wanted to have all my colossal meltdowns with and that I would forever want to be cold, wet, hungry, lost, and crying with that same lady…Kalene Cherisse Tilson. For the days leading up to Christmas we agreed to split up and Christmas shop for each other. We each needed to have something to open on the morning of the 25th. But, every time we did so, I used the time exploring jewelry shops. I knew what I wanted because I knew what Kalene wanted; more than that, I knew what Kalene liked. She is not a typical material driven girl; I knew that the ring I give to her in proposal of marriage she would consider the perfect one.

After seeing many options from many stores and many well-dressed Parisian men and women, I finally found it. A sparkling diamond surrounded by smaller sparkling diamonds. Perfect. I bought, paid, returned, paid more, and left….with the ring. One cannot really explain that exhilarating yet scary as ever feeling. My mind was racing and my heart was pounding. I also remembered that I still had no Christmas gift for her. Yeah, I have a diamond ring but it wasn’t for Christmas. I went over and over in my mind how and when I would do this. I could be truly unoriginal and unimaginative and surprise her at the Eiffel Tower. I knew that with her and I the moment would present itself naturally so I held out for it…or at least until she found the ring in my bag and asked a silly question like “What’s this?”

I carried the ring with me everywhere I went from that moment on. I couldn’t risk losing it or having her find it. We were backpacking together and our areas of personal space were pretty much restricted to our own bodies. Everything else was “our” space. And by that I mean Kalene’s space and Ken’s stuff will go “wherever”. In order for this momentous moment to be special I wanted the ring to be in the case so I could show to her in all its glory. Problem is, the box was quite big and I often looked like I was smuggling something or shoplifting. The giant bulge in my jacket pocket was about as conspicuous as using a dumptruck for a paper route.

Chrismas eve came. Could’ve been a good idea to do it then. We had plans to go to Notre Dame Cathedral that night for midnight mass. I thought I had better take it with me just in case. Our hotel was within walking distance to the cathedral. It was a bit cold, we both dressed up as best as two backpackers can; Kalene looked especially scrumptious. We arrived at about ten p.m. We found an allright seat and enjoyed a documentary film on the cathedral itself. I criticized it as my duty as a film scholar…it was done well. The Notre Dame choir was fantastic. Very moving and inspiring classical music. At midnight mass began. People were everywhere, packed into every isle in the place. We listened, sat, stood, and sang. Two young girls near us were not partaking in the festivities they were fumbling with their ipod and baguette!? They were at least nineteen and should have known better that this was a special occasion for those around them and to shut the hell up. Kalene was sitting to my right. The giant ring box was in my left pocket. I couldn’t get comfortable. My arm was lying on the box itself on my lap. It was stupid problem to have but it was a problem nonetheless. I am sure Kalene knew. I wanted to surprise her so the idea of it happening that night was scary. We were also very tired. I was up late the night before Skyping people. Mass ended and we left. Kalene was very cold and very tired. It was not fair of me to spring this moment on her. I figured, instead of proposing to her that night I would just get us lost on the way home…so I did.

Christmas morning. It was very sunny. The sun came into our room and woke us up quite early. We went to breakfast and ate like royalty. I forgot to mention that first thing Christmas morning, which was a Saturday too mind you, a garbage truck went by. There are too many reasons to list why that would not have happened in Canada. A Christmas on a Saturday in Canada?...your clocks don’t report to work on time.

We had arrangements to Skype both our families that afternoon so we can see them during their Christmas morning. Kalene had surprised me by digitally renting National Lampoon’s Christmas vacation. The greatest Christmas movie ever. We lay in our bed and watched. It was very majestic. This film has taken on an almost euphoric status for us both, representing family, Christmas, and everything we both hold dear. As much as it was funny it was quite sad. I remember the exact scene where it happened. Clark is standing looking out his window wearing a Chicago blackhawks jersey. He is fantasizing about his pool ideas. It was there that I paused it. I needed a break and Kalene had to pee. We had a quick chat about how much we missed home and we both decided that we would never be away from home for another Christmas again…ever. Kalene got up and entered the very crampt toilet (which is what Europeans call a washroom/bathroom). I sprang up immediately and grabbed my coat. I ripped it from the hanger, grabbed the box and opened it. It looked stunning. I licked the top of the ring to remove any dust or dirt and make it shine even more. I had no thoughts other than what I was about to do. It just felt right. This was the moment I was waiting for…we were planning our lives together in Paris on our most favourite day. I wedged myself between the wall and the bed outside the toilet door and got down on one knee. Our room was small. I was literally wedged. I heard a flush then a faucet. Wholy shit this is going to happen. I had no qualms about if she would say yes or not or if she would think this is how she imagined it or not or if the ring was perfect or not…I knew she would love the whole thing. The door opened and she saw me. Her face was in complete shock. She put her hands on her chest.

We disagree slightly about what I actually said but it went something like this. I told her I loved her, I wanted to be with her forever, I wanted a house, kids, a vegetable garden, to compost, and finally to get a dog. I took her right hand to simply hold as I spoke to her. She took this as me not knowing which hand the ring went on but trust me I knew what I was doing. I don’t think I actually said will you marry me, I asked her to be my wife. I took the ring from its place and slid it on her left hand finger. She said of course I will. Not yes, of course I will. Go Ken. She studied the ring, we were both crying, we kissed, and I got up. I asked her if she liked it and she said it was perfect…but that it was too big. Ah, pooh!

I, the bride-to-be couldn’t be happier. The moment was perfect for me, very romantic, and very real. Also, telling my family, though nerve-racking was great. They all congratulated us, I cried, and no one seemed concerned. Telling my grandparents, who are well into their 80’s over Skype video-chat, now, there’s moment I’ll never forget. It took a good five minutes to quiet everyone down and for my grandparents to get over the shock of being able to see us and talk to us in real time. If I couldn’t tell everyone is person, at least I could clearly see their reactions. It was awesome.

I know that this will go down as the most memorable Christmas is our arsenal so far. Raw and emotional, we realized that if there’s one lesson in all of this it is that we love certain traditions, and we’ll try anything once, but Christmas away from home it probably one thing we will NEVER repeat.